It’s been a little over three weeks since Ms. Brown and I instituted the Earning Car Rides Home with Good Behavior motivational system in Builder’s school day.  Suddenly, my contentious and oppositional child is behaving extraordinarily well!  We are now up to needing eight “car ride” dollars per a trip, with it going up to nine by next week.

This has been a big joint effort by not only Ms. Brown but also all the Specials teachers (music, physical education, art and media center) and the school administration.  And, of course, Builder!

There has only been one snag so far in his outstanding behavior. Earlier this week, he was all slated to be picked up for his earned car ride. All he had to do was have a good day in P.E.  That was it. No muss, no fuss, so I drove down to the school to pick him up.  When I arrived, however, Ms. Brown met me in the office to tell me that Builder had not earned his car ride. He had had a rough time in P.E. and had not earned his final “dollar.”

Well, there were some options.  What I chose to do, since Builder knew I was coming and had told his teacher so, was to go to his classroom and tell him to his face that he had not earned his ride (as he knew) but that I would be waiting for him at home as soon as he got off the bus.  This, I figured, would do two things. One, it would remind him that I was trustworthy. He expected me to be there and I came.  Two, it would serve to reinforce that his earning and getting car rides was a joint endeavor between me and his school.  And three, it also served to reinforce the negative reinforcement of not earning his car ride.

He cried.  Not loudly. Not horribly, but he cried a lot nonetheless. And all the while he cried, I held him and reminded him that I loved him, that there would be a favorite snack at home when he got there and that tomorrow would be a brand new day and I was very sure he would earn his car ride the next day.

Sure enough, he did.

So, the motivation is still working.  Why? I think it’s because the reward is still highly valuable to him. And, next week, we will have a new car for me to use to pick him up. <grin> I think he’ll really be looking forward to that. I hope that serves as further motivation to behave on a week that might otherwise be a little bit crazy…

Tags: Autism, Parenting

One thing that I love about teaching an Advent series to the kids every year is that every year, I see something new. Something more clearly. Something more powerfully. Whatever.  I still teach out of Isaiah, Micah, Genesis, Psalms, Jeremiah, but sometimes, I just get a cool “oooh!” from something.

This year, for me, it was this verse:

Now, I know all the discussions on “Matthew did not correctly interpret “almah” or “maiden” or “virgin.”  I have heard them and studied them. I still believe in the miraculous conception of Jesus.  It is of necessity something I take on faith, of course, since I was not personally at any physical exam to determine the true virginity of a young lady named Mary a long, long time ago.

But it isn’t that which made me go, “oooh!” today.  It was realizing how cool it is that Jesus was prophesied to be called Immanu’el.  It means, as you can see above, “God with us.”

As I tried to tell the kids today, this is a biggie.  Up until the birth of Christ, God was only with us in terms of his holy presence in the Holiest of Holies in the Temple in Jerusalem.  In order to approach the Almighty in person, there were cleansing rituals that had to be observed.  Lots were cast.  One was chosen to go and represent the people on their behalf in the very presence of God.  What an amazing concept.  You can read more about that, if you wish, in the first chapter of Luke’s gospel.

But the Messiah foretold and promised from God would be called Immanu’el.  He would be called God with us.  Because in him and through him, God would be with man.  He would walk with his creation. Talk with them. Understand them. Become one of them. Not as some terrifying presence behind a holy curtain, unapproachable save for a chosen few, but with US. Every single person.

To me, that is completely awesome, in the most correct sense.  That God would become for a time a human being.  With itches, zits, hunger pangs, sore feet, heartbreak.  God with us.

So, yeah, we started off a little early in our time of Advent celebration. Our preparation for the celebration of Christ’s birth (the timing of which I have probably blogged about before, I’ll have to check.).  But for me and for those who love him as Lord and Savior, really, we celebrate the coming of the Messiah, of Y’shua HaMashiach, all year long.

God with us. He is with me. He wants to be with you. Every day. Every moment. Every beat of your heart. And it’s not because he’s nosy. It’s because he loves you enough so that his own life was not too much to ask of him.

For us, it’s not too much to lengthen our time of celebration in honor of his birth.  It’s way cool to celebrate Christmas, no matter what time of year.

(Originally published by Sandi Layne, November, 2006)

Tags: Advent, Christmas, Jesus, prophecy